https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights Questions that come up in the rooms, answered the way they get answered there. en Tue, 06 Oct 2026 08:00:00 +0000 https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/getting-what-you-wanted/how-do-i-get-more-connection-in-my-lifehttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/getting-what-you-wanted/how-do-i-get-more-connection-in-my-lifeTue, 06 Oct 2026 08:00:00 +0000Getting what you wanted and feeling nothingYou get it by expressing yourself specifically to others. Connection seems to fade across full segments of our lives, so it appears as a shortage of people, more friends, a better city, a different line of work. What those areas have in common is that it was not requested from others in the way it was needed. Whatever connection you have, you asked for it. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/is-it-my-responsibility-to-helphttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/is-it-my-responsibility-to-helpFri, 02 Oct 2026 08:00:00 +0000Being the one who can handle itBecause the signal is small. Something doesn't sit right and you let it blow over, and the anger that would have marked the line shows up three days later, too late to use. So the decision runs on two questions rather than a feeling: whose outcome is this, and who gets the benefit of me doing it? https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/not-knowing-what-you-want/how-do-i-want-to-feel-in-a-relationshiphttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/not-knowing-what-you-want/how-do-i-want-to-feel-in-a-relationshipTue, 29 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Not knowing what you wantIt's the question that replaces the list of traits. A list describes a person you're waiting to meet. The feeling describes the experience you want, and an experience you can describe is one you can ask for. Start from moments where you felt what you needed to feel, get underneath trust and respect to what is uniquely yours, then say what somebody would have to do for you to feel it. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/why-is-it-so-hard-to-let-someone-take-care-of-mehttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/why-is-it-so-hard-to-let-someone-take-care-of-meTue, 29 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Being the one who can handle itBecause not needing anything is a skill you developed, and it worked. Being taken care of asks you to put it down, so the first thing you feel is discomfort, and the discomfort reads as proof you were right. It runs in an order. Uncomfortable, then proud of yourself for doing it anyway, then oh, this is kind of nice. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/do-i-give-myself-permission-to-take-a-day-offhttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/do-i-give-myself-permission-to-take-a-day-offFri, 25 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Being the one who can handle itPermission isn't what's missing. Nobody is stopping you, and a day you take without deciding what it's for gets spent on errands and catching up, then handed back to whoever needs something first. The day happens when there is one specific thing in it you want to do, and a time it starts. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/what-the-work-costs/why-is-personal-growth-so-lonelyhttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/what-the-work-costs/why-is-personal-growth-so-lonelyTue, 22 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000What the work costsBecause the loneliest stretch comes after the change works. The high fades a week or two in, the people and habits that fit the old you have gone, and you're holding a new standard before anyone around you has caught up. And if you're the capable one, your reflex is to get through that stretch on your own, which is the old pattern running again. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/not-knowing-what-you-want/i-dont-know-what-i-want-anymorehttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/not-knowing-what-you-want/i-dont-know-what-i-want-anymoreFri, 18 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Not knowing what you wantBecause wanting is a practice and yours went out of use. You can name what you don't want for ten minutes straight, and the moment the question turns around there is nothing there to grab hold of. It comes back at a smaller size than the question implies. One thing you want this month, near enough and specific enough that somebody could say no to it. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/how-do-i-stop-needing-to-be-neededhttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/being-the-capable-one/how-do-i-stop-needing-to-be-neededThu, 17 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Being the one who can handle itBecause it stopped being something you do for people and became the position you hold. You get standing from it, and safety, and nobody ever has to ask you for anything. That is why giving less doesn't shift it. What shifts it is letting one thing stay undone in front of someone who could do it, and finding out what they do. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/knowing-and-not-doing/why-doesnt-self-awareness-change-anythinghttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/knowing-and-not-doing/why-doesnt-self-awareness-change-anythingWed, 16 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Knowing your pattern and still running itBecause knowing it and integrating it are two different skills, and we are all trained to practise the first one. Understanding costs us nothing. Integrating it in front of another person costs us plenty. So the analysis keeps getting sharper while the gap between what you know and what you have changed stays exactly where it is. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/knowing-and-not-doing/why-do-i-know-what-to-do-but-still-not-do-ithttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/knowing-and-not-doing/why-do-i-know-what-to-do-but-still-not-do-itWed, 16 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Knowing your pattern and still running itBecause there is always a reason not to do it today, and the reason is usually a good one. It is not laziness and it is not a discipline problem. The delay is doing a job for you, which is why it keeps finding new material to work with. https://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/getting-what-you-wanted/why-do-i-feel-empty-after-achieving-a-goalhttps://www.parallaxxtransformations.com/insights/getting-what-you-wanted/why-do-i-feel-empty-after-achieving-a-goalWed, 16 Sep 2026 08:00:00 +0000Getting what you wanted and feeling nothingBecause the goal was measured by how it looks from the outside, and the experience you wanted from it was never named. You hit the target, the view stays the same, and there is nothing underneath to feel. Many of us keep chasing the next one until we know better.